Showing posts with label "In a Marriage". Show all posts
Showing posts with label "In a Marriage". Show all posts

Monday 13 February 2017

In a Marriage

In a Marriage
The apostle Peter states,
“Wives, in the same way be submissive to your husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives,  when they see the purity and reverence of your lives.  
Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes.  
Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.  
For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to make themselves beautiful. They were submissive to their own husbands, like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and called him her master. You are her daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear. 
Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.” 1 Peter 3:1-7.
Here is a potential controversial statement in the twenty-first century, “wives should be submissive to their husbands.”
However we should note that within Christianity women be they married or single are equal to men in every way.
Just because a woman or for that matter anyone submits to someone does not take away their equality or make them any less of a person.
Everything Peter is saying here can and I believe does apply to both spouses.
What Peter is saying is that a woman should not try to attract or keep a man by her outward adornment. Nor should a man.
We here in North America live in a very if you will “vain” age. Just turn on any television station and you are bombarded with cosmetic and clothing advertisements promising to make you look more beautiful and younger.
What Peter says is,
“Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes.  
Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.”
Our beauty should not come from what we look like on the outside but from our inward character. Many men and women have been let down over the years indeed the centuries when they’ve met a man or woman who looks beautiful only to find out they are not the person they thought they were.
That being said, I think it’s true to say some, perhaps most, couples when they first meet look at the persons outward appearance. But if that’s all you base your relationship on that relationship will fail. It is what is on the inside of any person that counts.
I’ve been married now for close to forty years and I know many people who have been married equally as long many longer. All will tell you their spouse is their best friend. They are, if you will, soul mates. Their love comes from within not what they see on the outside.
While many Christian wives I know will tell you they tend to submit to their husbands on most occasions. They will in no uncertain words tell you they are every bit his equal and are able to direct him and at times steer him away from bad decisions.
My first pastors wife half in jest told me “the man is the head of the house, but the woman is the neck and the neck turns the head.” 
What she meant was a successful marriage is a partnership of equals in which the couple works in unison. The neck is no less important than the head.
This is what Peter is talking about. Peter notes,
“...if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives,  when they see the purity and reverence of your lives.”
My last pastors wife is an example of this. She came to know the Lord first. She proceeded to live her life for God in front of him. She went to church even took their children. She was consistent in her faith. She did not force her faith on him. She simple lived her faith in front of him. This led to him to not only accept Christ as his Saviour but go on to become a pastor.  
This is something even husbands of non-believing wives can do also.
Peter’s other statement in this passage is aimed directly at husbands but again can apply to the wife also. He states,
“Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.”
Peter is obviously a man of his day. He calls the wife “a weaker partner”. This is a statement I can remember my grandparents using. Even my parents used this term occasionally, and they were each others equal and as liberal and progressive as anyone I’ve met from their generation. It’s as I said a cultural thing.
As I have said, we who live in North America and the western world today would say rightly, women are as strong and in everyway mans equal.
Thus Peters sentiment here that husbands treat their wives with respect applies to both spouses. The implication being if the husband, or for that matter the wife, does not do so it can hinder his prayer life.
As Christians within a marriage we are equal. Both spouses must respect each other. Our beauty should not be from how we adorn ourselves on the outside but come from deep inside our soul. For when it does a marriage will last a lifetime and a Christian marriage will point people to Christ.
Please think about it.