I got the following quote from Your daily dose at Chabad.org a Jewish website. The thoughts are based on letters and talks of the Rebbe, Rabbi M. M. Schneerson.
I can fully relate to what it is saying.
The quote goes like this,
“There is a suit we wear that has a life of its own. It is knitted of the fabric of words, images and sounds, mischievous characters that no one else can see—or would care to know.
You, however, hear them day and night, chattering, buzzing, playing their games in the courtyard of your mind. They are all the threads of the garment of thought that envelops you.
Leave your thoughts to play on their own, and they will take you for a ride to places you never wanted to see.
Grab the reins, master them, direct them, flex your mind, and they will follow. Provide them a script, and they will play along."
I live each day with Bipolar affective disorder (manic depression). It is “relatively” controlled. I say relatively because the type I live with is hard to control and at times gets out of control.
Bipolar is a condition in which moods change from very high, highs (the manic phase) to deep emotional lows (depression).
The depression can get so bad that many sadly, commit suicide. The highs on the other hand cause people to do odd things. They think they’re superman. Have the solution to everything. Their behaviour can become bizarre. They do a dozen or more jobs and don’t finish them. They can get into promiscuous behaviour. Sexual suicide someone has called it.
All of these behaviours can be controlled by the right combination of drug therapy, talk therapy and cognitive behavioural therapy. I know it works it worked for me.
Still however I go through bad times it is then that I am thankful for my faith. You see Rabbi Schneerson described what it is like for my mind when it is both high and low.
As I look at what the Rabbi says I can personalize it like this.
(My mind is), knitted of the fabric of words, images and sounds, mischievous characters that no one else can see—or would care to know.”
(I do), “hear them day and night, chattering, buzzing, playing their games in the courtyard of (my) mind. They are all the threads of the garment of thought that envelops (me).
(If I leave) these thoughts to play on their own, and they will take (me) for a ride to places (I) never wanted to see.”
Rabbi Schneerson however makes an important point when he says,
“Grab the reins, master them, direct them, flex your mind, and they will follow. Provide them a script, and they will play along.”
The reins for me was the Bible. The writer of Deuteronomy states,
“Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts.
Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.”
Deuteronomy 6:5-7.
It is believed by some scientist that study Bipolar disorder, that some people may be genetically predisposed to the illness. That a traumatic event can trigger it. That certainly was the case for me.
What however kept me from committing suicide or doing other stupid things over the years it took me to become “relatively stable” I firmly believe is my faith.
Long before the Bipolar was triggered I had studied the Bible. I had learned how to keep my thoughts under control.
Thus when the bucking bronco that is Bipolar disorder came I had some of the skills I needed to do to control the dangerous thoughts.
I did seek help from doctors. I believe that is a must. At the same time however before the diagnosis was made, I called on my faith in God to get me through what was one of the worst times in my life.
Post script
Bipolar disorder and any mental illness is a real illness. If you, or anyone you know believe you have a mental health issue see a doctor. Don’t try to cure it yourself. Remember mental illness is as real an illness as any other. Some have likened it to diabetes of the mind.
Like real diabetes you will need the help of a health care professional and medication to control it.
I have sadly seen people both inside and outside the church come to harm because they did not get proper medical help.
I am a firm believer that the only way to deal with mental health problems is through a combination of things. Those things being drug therapy, Psychotherapy, (by seeing a good psychiatrist.), group and behavioural therapy. As well as building around you a team of people that for me has been doctors, my wife, my adult children, family and friends.
All of this coupled with a strong faith has truly helped me. It can work for you.
Post script to my post script
Sometime ago I thought it would be good to visualize what I perceive as my normal brain and my Bipolar brain. The result is the illustration below.
Please think about it.
